tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10656556680489326662024-03-06T07:47:27.528+08:00bahala na si batmanKapag alam mong nagawa mo na ang lahat ng kaya mo, wala ka ng ibang pwedeng sabihin kundi:"bahala na si batman!"rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-42805225052933459912013-07-31T23:19:00.000+08:002013-07-31T23:19:33.693+08:00Will you allow me to love you again?"Will you allow me to love you again?" That's what God asked me last weekend. Actually, God has been loving me all these times but I was too busy, too hurt to notice. All the while, I thought he owed me. All the while I thought he should make up to me for something he promised but failed to keep. It was only when we had this serious talk after a long time that it hit me...God kept his promise. God fulfilled his word.<br />
<br />
I was so caught up looking at the closed door that I didn't realize God has opened another door. He surprised me in silence. He silently crept behind my back, subtly, just like a thief in the night. It took a while for me to realize that the door is already open. That the grace has already came through this other door. All this time, I had it at the back of my head, as though keeping tab at God, that he owed me big time because of this one door. But the cliche is true, when one door closes, another opens.<br />
<br />
Through this other door, love came. Through this other door, God taught me how to love. Love in its purest. Love in its truest. Devoid of costs, of measure. Devoid of conditions, of timing, of control. I am simply gripped by its power...a power that weakens my defenses yet strengthens my will.<br />
<br />
"Will you allow me to love you again?" The question sounds so simple but I know the consequence of being loved by God is not to simply feel happiness or joy, or even comfort. To be beheld by God in love is to share in his way of loving...and what is this loving...that which will lay down one's life for a friend, for a beloved. When love is stronger, more powerful, more meaningful than life itself.<br />
<br />
Although the surrender pains me, breaks me, pierces straight through me, it also transforms me. It changes me. I begin to see that I am no longer after my own happiness. I am now after someone else's joy. It doesn't matter anymore if you are part of that happiness, or if you are the cause of that joy. The other is more important than yourself. The focus has switched from yourself to the other. It is not forced. You just love. You just be. Be love.<br />
<br />
"Will you allow me to love you again?" It is a rhetoric question. God knows what my answer is. But the beauty of this question is not that it begs an answer. Its beauty lies on the invitation. God will never force anything on me, even his kind of love. There is no mistaking, God loves me, loves us. God loves us freely. In spite of and despite of ourselves. And yet, to share in his kind of loving, God sees that an invitation is necessary. It is necessary because saying yes to this invitation entails responsibility and commitment. And not everyone is ready. yet.<br />
<br />
"Will you allow me to love you again?" <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-43447596693808958532012-11-27T22:29:00.000+08:002012-11-27T22:29:42.829+08:00when the answer is right in front of you<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Waiting is my most dreaded word. Impatience, I guess, is my second name. I would fail the marshmallow test, had I taken it when I was little. I don't get impatient though on just anything but only on things that mean a lot to me, things that matter to me, things that give me joy and life, and they are not even just <i>things</i>; usually it is not something but someone.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Praying is a consequence of waiting. When impatience sinks in, and one can't wait any longer, one prays. The word is beg; one begs that the waiting be over.Soon. Now, if possible. One begs that the answer to one's prayer be heard. One begs that the answer be given already. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Countless times I have begged for an answer. It's been so long that I have waited for the answer. It made me think that maybe, just maybe, the answer is not coming; or that it is a no. Maybe I have to stop waiting. I have to start moving on. And so did I. Then it hit me! The answer is right in front of me all along! The answer has been the answer all along. The answer is the answer I begged, I prayed, I waited for.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">Suddenly, I am humbled. My God indeed has listened to my prayer. Even before I begged for it, he has already given me the answer. It just took me a while to recognize it, or if I had, it took me a while to accept that it is indeed what I asked for. It may not be in the form I imagined the answer would come, but it is still the answer I need. And the surprising thing about it is, the waiting is still not over. The waiting is never-ending. It pushes me to continue to hope, continue to live, continue to love. </span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj75FxQ8DqysVCTk2dmpPSvVqB7QB3h0bIywrvNfjHAnzcd_hp119o7AEFXxHI6920rW1RQ_aFBZBHoabG_yedhtozgD_PBsg9aHDpNNt0iZ-bD0SXEJPmDuCKjf2FIW1eegvfetyy5tBo/s1600/tumblr_m3xisjVzKW1qdg2p2o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj75FxQ8DqysVCTk2dmpPSvVqB7QB3h0bIywrvNfjHAnzcd_hp119o7AEFXxHI6920rW1RQ_aFBZBHoabG_yedhtozgD_PBsg9aHDpNNt0iZ-bD0SXEJPmDuCKjf2FIW1eegvfetyy5tBo/s320/tumblr_m3xisjVzKW1qdg2p2o1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif;">I guess waiting is inevitable for someone who loves. Waiting is the fire that burns the heart to love more passionately, more deeply, more selflessly. As James Donelan, SJ in his article "The Sacrament of Waiting" puts it, "</span><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">For if we never learn to wait, we will never learn to love someone other than ourselves."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><br /></span>
rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-79486557058024452632011-04-23T15:52:00.000+08:002011-04-23T15:52:07.902+08:00Himig ng MangingibigHindi ako karapat-dapat<br />
sa kanya, Panginoon.<br />
Hindi ko magawang isipin<br />
siya'y ibibigay mo sakin.<br />
<br />
Ngunit ang pangako mo,<br />
ay hingin lang sa iyo,<br />
anuman ang naisin,<br />
ito'y iyong tutuparin.<br />
<br />
Sapagka't ang ibig mo,<br />
ay tanging kasiyahan ko,<br />
mahirap man na tangapin,<br />
Pag-ibig mo'y tapat sa akin.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-46003965395239333552011-04-23T15:50:00.000+08:002011-04-23T15:50:12.553+08:00PabaonHindi kita iiwan.<br />
Maghihintay ako sa'yo.<br />
Gaano man katagal,<br />
Ako'y maghihintay sa'yo.<br />
<br />
Hahayaan kang tuklasin<br />
ang nais ng puso mo.<br />
Pababayaan kang tuklasin<br />
ang kasiyahan ng puso mo.<br />
<br />
Mahirap man sa akin<br />
ang ipaubaya ka sa Kanya,<br />
wala ring magagawa<br />
kundi ang magtiwala---<br />
<br />
na ang pag-ibig mo<br />
at pag-ibig ko,<br />
balang araw, magtatagporebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-31295949624514915432010-07-11T21:23:00.002+08:002010-07-11T22:03:07.475+08:00Almost 6 years after<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWyPdEXRcwpNQJQNmRrQD6fCaPO9VgjwbhmFR6veyEe27SH6ZUVbSRISqFxzIk9p7MkH1XAumzFsiuaTygxRgSb7dPmYFpdZm7SKfdSnWIK6K24pEvvQODioFBPAIdEK0e0_s5q10Dvl8/s1600/p1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWyPdEXRcwpNQJQNmRrQD6fCaPO9VgjwbhmFR6veyEe27SH6ZUVbSRISqFxzIk9p7MkH1XAumzFsiuaTygxRgSb7dPmYFpdZm7SKfdSnWIK6K24pEvvQODioFBPAIdEK0e0_s5q10Dvl8/s320/p1.jpg" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjoxubI76U0VGcmWn6zRTru30ZWCkB0Dk1FTUaPy_PDoO4TeR3nwaf0Fy0kKVSP0Bgd32hU1wxTHn5qSsaIb1R8tLJs8xpJs1IPFkmmBsQ9d3qsGscS9dvLYFxeP7garNEZUayMtSfPaY/s1600/p2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjoxubI76U0VGcmWn6zRTru30ZWCkB0Dk1FTUaPy_PDoO4TeR3nwaf0Fy0kKVSP0Bgd32hU1wxTHn5qSsaIb1R8tLJs8xpJs1IPFkmmBsQ9d3qsGscS9dvLYFxeP7garNEZUayMtSfPaY/s320/p2.jpg" /></a> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmU99ZUSrUwHXNz-1GhmxXubtuNTrIwNRqxCFDEP69mn_2ZMWCk2ayTSnsJ41MZn5J2Sa27OBYdkQqyc9wLkRxYCvFSdzjsps8f8-ZesDj2a0wshvwIgdHPqZOY0n-DenL6JNHTA7yZtk/s1600/p3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmU99ZUSrUwHXNz-1GhmxXubtuNTrIwNRqxCFDEP69mn_2ZMWCk2ayTSnsJ41MZn5J2Sa27OBYdkQqyc9wLkRxYCvFSdzjsps8f8-ZesDj2a0wshvwIgdHPqZOY0n-DenL6JNHTA7yZtk/s320/p3.jpg" width="240" /></a> </div><div class="" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">I wrote this on my Journal last August 11,2004. It was a Wednesday: I was only 26 then. He was 31. Now, 6 years later, I am about to turn 33, and he, 40.</div><br />
Our story is not the typical ex-lovers who after years of being estranged, were reunited back together. Ours was different because in the first place, we never really missed out on each other's lives. Even after our break up that year, we still managed not to be estranged with each other at all. We kept that special relationship intact all these years. We did not break the communication. We remained good friends. For six years we kept tabs on each other's personal lives, personal affairs. I knew who and when he was dating, he knew who I was with and whom I was fond of. We were open to each other that we still do care for each other, that there is still that special fondness but we never tried anymore to give each other chance. Both of us knew we had to move on, to find our happiness with another person. And we were ok with it for the past 6 years.<br />
<br />
In the last two years, we were both in our respective serious relationships. I was about to settle down with someone, he was about to propose to his girlfriend. We were both happy for each other. But by some twist of fate, my boyfriend and I broke up, and I was alone. He was there to console me and give me some words of consolation. And I appreciated that about him. I envied him because it would seem he has already found the person he would spend the rest of his life with (at that time he was very much in love with his girlfriend and he confided that he had plans of proposing to her November 2009.) I can only be happy for him. <br />
<br />
In the months that would follow my break-up, I unexpectedly fell for someone. He knew about it and he suggested ways on how to catch that person's attention. We were just happy comparing notes. Catching up on each other's lives and wishing each other success in our respective personal lives. Then December came, in passing I asked if he has already proposed to his girlfriend and he said that they have already broken up. That was the end of it. I couldn't exactly describe how I felt when I learned about it. I guess I was half-glad and half-confused to know it. I was too scared to probe on what I truly feel because at that time I still have to settle my feelings for another person. But I was just glad that he was single again. And I am too. This time, after 6 years, we are both available. I am just consoled with this fact. But that's just about it. I have no intention to explore a second chance with him...but I guess opportunity has a way of presenting itself. Last June, opportunity knocked on our doors. One simple question led to an unexpected response. What I thought before as a lost cause, a long shot possibility, proved to be another shot on fulfilling a long hoped-for dream, another chance on love.<br />
<br />
The story is not yet over. It might not end the way I hope it would. But the fact is, fate gave us a second chance; and this is enough for me to continue to hope. I am posting this journal because I want to remember. I want to be reminded of that day: hope has no time limit, it knows no bounds. So I continue to hope from this day forward that one day, in God's time and with God's will, he will fulfill my desire.<br />
<br />
The last line of this journal was, "My prayers and hope is still, that one day, I'd find Tony at the end of this journey." And I can't help but smile because if I think about it, he was with me in my journey all along. He never really left my side or abandoned me. He was here all this time. I just hope he sticks around until the end.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijs1bpkJktCMGkaqp-iRyhvOqTS1JfL7yyecX2HdXgew4mOReGFzk74-2moNoyF0I_rxRM7Ws6lpVHuG2nnotzhTJMEXDlWgLrLI1W8Uo08rymxY0WU2vTegSadDHwANJisDZvQzap0jU/s1600/april+1th+sis+b-day.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijs1bpkJktCMGkaqp-iRyhvOqTS1JfL7yyecX2HdXgew4mOReGFzk74-2moNoyF0I_rxRM7Ws6lpVHuG2nnotzhTJMEXDlWgLrLI1W8Uo08rymxY0WU2vTegSadDHwANJisDZvQzap0jU/s200/april+1th+sis+b-day.jpg" width="153" /></a></div>rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-4890593288377855012010-05-02T21:07:00.000+08:002010-05-02T21:07:16.444+08:00A prayer answered Almost 2 years ago, I wrote this note to myself. Never published it because I thought and felt it very personal for me. But now I am posting it because I just want to let the whole world know that God has answered my prayer, that is the last line of this note.<br />
<br />
I almost forgot about the person I was referring to here, maybe because as the days went by, my connection to this person proved to be just maybe a mere infatuation. In the end, the strong feelings subsided and gradually I began to just regard him as a simple friend. I was not anymore wishing that this friendship be deepened. As months passed by, I am just happy that I have overcome my uneasiness around him.<br />
<br />
It is just surprising that lately, this person has done little things for me. We are not that close, and that is why I am beginning to wonder what is the meaning of all these? I couldn't help then to reconsider him again. I couldn't contain my utter gratefulness to God for somehow, still answering my simple wish before, for me to become an important part of this person's life. I said before even if things were different, I would still not wish for him because I regard him as someone unreachable for me, someone who I just want to put high on a pedestal, I have that inner sense that I am not worthy of him. And yet these past few weeks, and months, this person has tried to reach out to me. This person has been my saving glory, my knight in shining armour. At a time when I am down and just feeling low, this person will somehow make me feel special, make me feel worthy. It would seem that he always does things at the right time. He always takes me by surprise! And even this realization now is a great surprise for me. And because of this, I thank him. and I thank God...He is indeed a God of surprises. <br />
<br />
=================================================================<br />
<br />
be still my heart part 1, May 16,2008<br />
Last night, for some reason (actually I know the reason but I can't disclose it now), I just couldn't fall asleep. I was restless all night and this lasted until around 1:30 in the morning. I only prayed "be still my heart." It seemed that I could not contain my emotions. I'd like to see him, hear from him. Am i falling? I am not sure. And I don't want to pursue even. Not because it is impossible because nothing is impossible with God but even if things were different I know I could never wish for him. I am just happy where he is now. I just pray that I'd become an important part of his life. rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-70397490509778171462010-04-18T22:11:00.000+08:002010-04-18T22:11:22.012+08:00maghihintay ako"Maghihintay ako."<br />
Iyan ang pangako ng puso ko sa puso mo.<br />
<br />
Gaano man katagal<br />
Ilang taon man ang magdaan<br />
Basta, pagdating mo,<br />
Asahan mo akong sasalubong sa'yo.<br />
<br />
Wala ng agam-agam<br />
Buo na ang pasiya ko---<br />
"Maghihintay ako sa iyo."rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-79688886073752731302010-04-05T19:36:00.000+08:002010-04-05T19:36:46.825+08:00Discovering the Island of CulionWhen I volunteered to help out in a retreat to be held in Culion, it was only because I wanted to see the beauty of the place which I originally discovered through a friend’s photos of the Island during his stay. I did not know that it was once a Leper Colony. I know that a place exists but I did not connect the two. For me, I wanted to go because I wanted to experience first hand and see with my eyes if truly the beauty I saw on the photos is real.<br />
<br />
It was my first time, after a long time, to spend holy week outside of my sacred space in Sacred Heart Novitiate. I had separation anxieties prior to the trip, I had second thoughts of going. But off I went. Excited of what God has in store for me on this trip. The grace I asked before I went was the grace to rediscover HIM anew.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTh2TddSDxAtR5m4tSGsfOjzSMCpquBA2K8YeI2EVe7tk9kTm5KGbwsaevE_cELtJxWoTR2g3n4hWpyTNdYSaA_HQ6NO60S4tcryxqVGtKgxWWx5vbw_TKYKmpUFgoNznckzFSbLLplSs/s1600/DSC03044.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTh2TddSDxAtR5m4tSGsfOjzSMCpquBA2K8YeI2EVe7tk9kTm5KGbwsaevE_cELtJxWoTR2g3n4hWpyTNdYSaA_HQ6NO60S4tcryxqVGtKgxWWx5vbw_TKYKmpUFgoNznckzFSbLLplSs/s200/DSC03044.jpg" width="150" /></a>On our way to the Island, still far from reaching the shores of Culion, someone pointed to the large Eagle image set on the landscape of Culion Island. <br />
I learned that this huge stone formation was made by the patients themselves as a great symbol of gratitude to the medical community who has helped them all these years and found cure for their disease. On top of this Eagle is a big statue of Jesus with his hands reaching out, welcoming the people coming to Culion.<br />
<br />
On the other side of the island, sharing an equal prominence with “Agila” is the big red structure of the Immaculate Conception Parish of Culion. This was part of the fortress built by the Spaniards in the 16th century to protect it against outside forces.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrfL-yjmWjURt7cqMygSPwUodTOAYIwszZWpxHVoGO18J6e-aireYoYwkTIWSzU46Xihf52hDpobqNL9_gC8KyKAoP8RTeYRtm6-McAN2rGAFWszhVL0EyIQoUjhIMZIBAn457fhjn9I/s1600/DSC03046.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrfL-yjmWjURt7cqMygSPwUodTOAYIwszZWpxHVoGO18J6e-aireYoYwkTIWSzU46Xihf52hDpobqNL9_gC8KyKAoP8RTeYRtm6-McAN2rGAFWszhVL0EyIQoUjhIMZIBAn457fhjn9I/s320/DSC03046.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5sAAuxmjdEj4jKfMrMRk1OD02l9QYAz1dbIp3SdFxXWeFdYnSXBqboQURfi2jrtIzBkIvHEGEAG4i4IZ3pWNiw1-P_KaI21oo_9heklaRY53VF8jhetvfD_IaQqUk_BsbQ9g0mYaWfQ0/s1600/DSC03182.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5sAAuxmjdEj4jKfMrMRk1OD02l9QYAz1dbIp3SdFxXWeFdYnSXBqboQURfi2jrtIzBkIvHEGEAG4i4IZ3pWNiw1-P_KaI21oo_9heklaRY53VF8jhetvfD_IaQqUk_BsbQ9g0mYaWfQ0/s200/DSC03182.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjnZfFbM77r5fNNZ3tRGOSxpZov7K7TkhHGErnYcmo2KgAu-Sk7961fkoZ5plhvtgiQ2ww92KgJienCL-l-g7sO1U8-J78TxqZuXjm8AI086fVyuiACffpytghC0pCvxRWNn9pugFPuPU/s1600/DSC03151.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjnZfFbM77r5fNNZ3tRGOSxpZov7K7TkhHGErnYcmo2KgAu-Sk7961fkoZ5plhvtgiQ2ww92KgJienCL-l-g7sO1U8-J78TxqZuXjm8AI086fVyuiACffpytghC0pCvxRWNn9pugFPuPU/s200/DSC03151.jpg" width="150" /></a>Adjacent to the Church building and fronting the Culion waters is the lighthouse, which also serves as a view deck where one can marvel at the coastline of Culion Island and the most magnificent sunrise and moonrise one can behold. I’ve spent a lot of times here in the day and in the evening. You can see the serenity and calmness of the sea from up here. Sometimes, you don’t need to think of anything when you look at the sea. It just gives you a relaxing and calming feeling; it feels like your heartbeat is synchronizing itself to the calming rhythm of the waves.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi65M5dzPZiK6oYplG2rVRdSm15jpI6QZOKiiygRbIig4w0KH4MNr-imhOU_0PZWW2pSjrO9YtN-OtAx6ix2lWwCm0JSPod8y31WitNVPJcBPPI0eCb819RFrwd8z3mWe2zhdGQKKnT29c/s1600/DSC03139.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi65M5dzPZiK6oYplG2rVRdSm15jpI6QZOKiiygRbIig4w0KH4MNr-imhOU_0PZWW2pSjrO9YtN-OtAx6ix2lWwCm0JSPod8y31WitNVPJcBPPI0eCb819RFrwd8z3mWe2zhdGQKKnT29c/s200/DSC03139.jpg" width="150" /></a></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeijqc7V9rLUp-q6s6O1bebAzMDL63c-AhnFB7s8BH8yonJ-QFs5MsaxFXTQi16QAxI6SvDUcN8L74k327cFOUsstot28FrKkcNCr7BpUFQlfsVtRGk-9H1kEZwlUdgrZsWyb4q5Q6k7Y/s1600/DSC03110.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgeijqc7V9rLUp-q6s6O1bebAzMDL63c-AhnFB7s8BH8yonJ-QFs5MsaxFXTQi16QAxI6SvDUcN8L74k327cFOUsstot28FrKkcNCr7BpUFQlfsVtRGk-9H1kEZwlUdgrZsWyb4q5Q6k7Y/s200/DSC03110.jpg" width="150" /></a> Then there is the sunrise and moonrise, which treat the visitors of Culion to a very special dramatic show that happens daily. And in the evening, the skies is clothed with its vast collection of stars. It gives a great contrast to the blackness of the sea.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDKUNELjI7m-3QPgXQMN1x6EwqBo_4cfICtuE3pS8yEZYUak-jciCNzD-Cj6ZpGbSju9BREMRyZn4avAKWocxaWbbpAIBKhI7sJjMtY1dfsqVVzVH3_RNcIZ8RFMnFfVpDq9_5bxfFHMw/s1600/DSC03211.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDKUNELjI7m-3QPgXQMN1x6EwqBo_4cfICtuE3pS8yEZYUak-jciCNzD-Cj6ZpGbSju9BREMRyZn4avAKWocxaWbbpAIBKhI7sJjMtY1dfsqVVzVH3_RNcIZ8RFMnFfVpDq9_5bxfFHMw/s200/DSC03211.jpg" width="200" /></a>There are a lot of ways to appreciate the beauty of Culion. One, as I have mentioned is from the view deck of the light house. The other one is through the “Agila”, a 200+ steps that allows you to view Culion from above. One can also make the stations of the cross, which leads to the top, to the big statue of Jesus. But, the best way for me, would still be “Pulang Lupa.”<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm52H2ndZrJeIXjlt7BEAXcnL0Ak8x54gNwp7feB3fWTE61sRgVWdOZHm_5XLzWo2iyAY6db9wCH7kaaBZJZt6-4wRVc4Q_5dz8b7Pi0xNKapyLd1UNwU_x0rcynmOXWQ8F94KYFrVh94/s1600/DSC03063.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjm52H2ndZrJeIXjlt7BEAXcnL0Ak8x54gNwp7feB3fWTE61sRgVWdOZHm_5XLzWo2iyAY6db9wCH7kaaBZJZt6-4wRVc4Q_5dz8b7Pi0xNKapyLd1UNwU_x0rcynmOXWQ8F94KYFrVh94/s200/DSC03063.jpg" width="150" /></a>Pulang Lupa is a magical place for me. It is a one long stretch of path on top of connecting hills that can serve as a mediation haven. I’ve been here twice. I love the place because it allowed me to live my dream from childhood to walk on top of the hills like Maria in the “Sound of Music.” On top, you can see Culion Island and its surrounding islands. The ambiance up here is so serene. You can only hear the chirping of the birds, the nuances of the forest, sometimes, the passing of a motorboat, but in most cases, the silence is deafening that it calms you. I was in awe one morning that we went here because right before my eyes, I saw the sun rose from the horizon. Truly, truly magical.<br />
<br />
<br />
Through the beauty of creation, I discovered God anew. And as though these were not enough, God introduced himself to me through the history of Culion. <br />
<br />
I learned from the people I encountered that it was only in 1999 that the cure for leprosy was found. Since its establishment in 1902 as a Leper Colony, people diagnosed with leprosy were isolated from the rest of the world and sent here in Culion to live. For so many years, they were treated as outcasts of the society, forgotten, and brought to exile. The streets I walked on, the school, the church--- these sheltered them. They have walked this street, they have prayed in this church, seated on this pew, studied in this school, etc. Their stories were real. They were real. And this island became their sanctuary from the prejudices of the world, from the discrimination of those from the outside. <br />
<br />
Their lives were not easy. They were forced to be separated from their loved ones, for some time, they were segregated and could not live normally as social beings. But as time went by, the hearts of these men and women prevailed. In the end, they were able to live normal lives, though may not fully but definitely better than the first time they were sent here.<br />
<br />
I was also amazed with the countless people who also willingly devoted their time and energies to the patients. The medical practitioners who continuously strove to find cure for the disease, the volunteers who took care of the patients, the philanthropic institutions who helped fund the needs of the Lepers, the religious nuns and priests who did not just provide for the spiritual needs of the patients but also helped in taking care of them and providing support. Countless names, countless faces. But in the end, their efforts paid off because after a century of trial and error, cure for this disease was discovered and patients began to get well and get healed.<br />
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I do not know if the history of the place, the context of this place, could be the reason I find the residents welcoming, humble, simple folks. I am surprised every time a resident will greet me “good morning” when they see me walking in the street. Or how they will extend their assistance to me when I need it, even in small matters. I easily felt at home here. I feel like I belong in this place. It seems like you could trust any one you encounter. Life here is so simple and yet so meaningful and rich.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4vauIEMyowRWjThFVp3qXLapzF9p89pxjuMDGgexQDziFSa65OssAlRccgzrFbWqXGpx_U3kwYi49MM_QrTua32yCsrjJFgJyVkwXBHSS1m2r2AltoCbmTMc0rtADUFHVRFyKfQtCUUc/s1600/DSC03531.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj4vauIEMyowRWjThFVp3qXLapzF9p89pxjuMDGgexQDziFSa65OssAlRccgzrFbWqXGpx_U3kwYi49MM_QrTua32yCsrjJFgJyVkwXBHSS1m2r2AltoCbmTMc0rtADUFHVRFyKfQtCUUc/s320/DSC03531.jpg" /></a></div><br />
I cannot really sum up my experience here in Culion in just one paragraph. It is hard to describe something so beautiful especially if you know that even the word beautiful is not enough. This island is special because of its natural wonders, its people, its story. Until now it brings me to chills to just realize that this Island of Culion became a haven for healing, sanctuary for the outcasts. The magic of this place is that. It accepted what the rest of the world rejected. And so, I could not help but relate the Island of Culion to the Kingdom of God. In my theology class, I learned and I taught my students that the Kingdom of God is where justice, peace and compassion reign. Here in Culion, these kingdom values are alive and lived out by the people. Here in Culion, I am convinced God lives. God is present. God reigns.<br />
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During my last remaining days in Culion, I made it a point to store up a lot of wonderful memories of the place, wonderful memories of people, wonderful memories of my encounters with God; so that when I go back to the world, I have Culion to serve as fortress for me, a sanctuary for me, a proof for me that hope reigns, love reigns, God reigns.<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC8YW1ndfMpOk0Uc-Nn4OvGmUc8OW0ZZsjiug2UwsbMaEg_vpw8MfboXn4D1jBciYVVCQh5ifr_RTgjbhrqk5sDslqVf6ap2Q9YnBKDoYhPmL9L-VrMGA3xOmRg0J9QU3UhWHEkCZNXS4/s1600/DSC04110.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhC8YW1ndfMpOk0Uc-Nn4OvGmUc8OW0ZZsjiug2UwsbMaEg_vpw8MfboXn4D1jBciYVVCQh5ifr_RTgjbhrqk5sDslqVf6ap2Q9YnBKDoYhPmL9L-VrMGA3xOmRg0J9QU3UhWHEkCZNXS4/s400/DSC04110.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
I left Culion with a heavy heart today. Each step away from its shores was difficult. I am going back to the “real world”, as one retreatant termed it. But for me, Culion Island is as real as the place I am going back to. I just find consolation in the thought that one day, I will sail back again to Culion to experience its warmth, love, and beauty.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-7996411324994341802010-03-25T21:35:00.000+08:002010-03-25T21:35:00.472+08:00The need to be with someone is no longer there. On my own, I am already complete, i already feel fulfilled. I realized that it is all God's work. He alone made me complete, help me feel content and fulfilled. I am convinced that His love is already enough, is sufficient for me. <br />
<br />
The need to be with someone is no longer there...but the desire to share my life with someone is another matter. That, I feel is growing stronger. The NEED now becomes a DESIRE, which sees it more as a gift rather than a requirement. From demanding God that this need be met, it recognizes that now it depends on the gracious act of God that this desire be fulfilled.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-54686970443512734792010-03-01T21:11:00.000+08:002010-03-01T21:11:59.864+08:00malayang mangingibigUnti unti na siyang kumakawala sa aking mga yakap<br />
at ang aming mga kamay na dati'y kay higpit na magkahawak,<br />
ngayo'y malapit nang tuluyang magbitaw.<br />
<br />
Wala na ang tamis sa kanyang mga ngiti.<br />
Bihira ko na rin marinig ang awit ng pag-ibig<br />
na noo'y madalas niyang imutawi.<br />
<br />
Hindi ko na maramdaman ang init.<br />
Tuluyan na nga siyang lumalayo,<br />
dahan-dahan nang naglalaho.<br />
<br />
Hindi na niya ko maririnig pa<br />
anuman lakas ng pagtawag ko sa kanya.<br />
Kaya't hahayaan ko na lang siya.<br />
Palalayain ko na.<br />
<br />
Sapaka't ako'y nagmamahal, <br />
handa na akong magpaubaya.<br />
Sige na, malaya ka na.<br />
<br />
Tahakin mo ang daang sa tingin mo<br />
ay lubos kang liligaya.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-30389275338260533472010-02-04T22:34:00.000+08:002010-02-04T22:34:05.799+08:00I have the power to recreate my life each dayThis week is a blessing to me. It all started with the conviction that I want to make good use of my time while I am at home and am waiting to land a new job. As I mentioned last time, I am down to my last hundreds. To-date, I only have about P140 in my wallet and few coins and yet I am having an incredible week. I realize money isn't everything, one just needs to be creative. Last Tuesday, I went to an interview and only spent P40 for fare (back and forth). It was a first after a very long time since I seldom ride jeeps anymore especially since riding cabs is more convenient and more comfortable. And yet, the experience was worth it. It allowed me to be more mindful of a bigger world than me. That night, my colleagues from my previous work came to have dinner. They were the ones who brought dinner though. The next day, I just spent the first part of the day "productively" by going through and sending through my CV to all potential employers I would like to work for. Now, it is a matter of waiting for their call. In the afternoon, I decided to go to mass to make the rest of my time worthwhile. I also decided to walk to Church as I seldom go out anymore and hence, lack physical exercise. Walking was a treat for me because I was greeted by the beauty of the sun setting down. To my awe, I took a shot of the sunset. After the mass, I spent quality time at the Blessed Sacrament and was able to talk to Jesus again. These words remain in me after that conversation:Love is patient. Love is kind. Love rejoices in the truth. Rejoice, celebrate your truth, your beauty. Claim your truth. Love never fails. He also promised me that he'd take care of my financial concerns and that I need not worry about it, particularly the one that is due already this Friday.<br />
<br />
Today, I decided that the grace I would ask God is to make each day magical for me. I realize then that I want to make each day different. To do something different each day. So today, I went out early, walked to the baking supplies store and then eventually go to the grocery to buy ingredients for my brownies. I want to try to bake brownies today. I was excited to start on this as I've been craving for a certain brownie taste since last week. After it was done, I was glad that the recipe I downloaded was the exact brownie taste I want. I was a bit disappointed though because it did not have the texture I want. I googled later on that I should have used chocolate instead of cocoa. Again, in the afternoon, I decided to hear mass. I start to love walking to Church. I spent a few minutes in the Blessed Sacrament and then went to hear mass. On this particular day, there weren't much mass goers who went compared yesterday. This must be the reason I noticed the people who were present, in particular the old couples. I was just inspired by the sight of the three old couple holding hands as they sang the "Our Father." Silently, I wished I could find someone I would grow old with. It was a beauty to behold that in the midst of the "temporariness" (if there is such a word) of this world, there are still those who decide to stick together through thick or thin, for better or for worse....<br />
<br />
Oh and I almost forget, today, God showed that his promise is never empty. The problem I have with the money to fulfill my obligation tomorrow, he took care of that already. The amount I needed is exactly what he gave me. Praise be to God!rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-81258476141127126042010-02-01T11:26:00.000+08:002010-02-01T11:26:42.163+08:00I'm down to my last hundred/sI just paid my bills today. It has been two weeks since I resigned from my job. It wasn't really a difficult decision for me since I've been struggling to go to work every single day. No regrets. But now reality is slowly biting on me. I am down to my last hundred/s. So how can I survive the next few days with only P300 in my wallet? I am still looking for a job. I have a scheduled interview tomorrow. Gone were the days that I can take a cab to go to my interviews. This time, I have to be creative, I need to stretch my money! So I guess I have to learn to take the jeepneys again and walk! :) I am not yet panicking. No, because I am still expecting income from working part time with my previous employer (thank God for that opportunity). Although whatever I will earn here will not be enough to cover my monthly obligation, every single peso will still help augment my situation right now. So pasalamat na rin. Ayoko muna problemahin ang hindi pa problema :) Sabi ko nga, "bahala na si batman!" I'm keeping the faith that God knows my needs and he will provide.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-12915865837439683502010-01-09T23:48:00.000+08:002010-01-09T23:48:18.972+08:00I'm moving onMark this date: January 9, 2010. The day I finally decided to move on. No there is no bitterness, no it does not leave a bitter or even sour taste in my mouth. Today I choose happiness. Today I choose to be good to myself. Today I choose to not go against the flow. Today I am not fighting the current. Today, I am going where the flow naturally leads me. I now know what really is important to me: validation. The reason I struggled so much in the past months was I could not come to terms with my need for validation and my pursuit of that "great romance." I am struggling between what I need and what I want. I was hung up on finding the ONE, settling for someone I thought was the one. But common sense would prove that you would definitely know that the one is the ONE. Naturally, things should fall into place. Everything naturally flows and leads to the one. As one great eastern tradition believes, we should go with the flow and not against it. We struggle because we try to fight the natural flow. But if we go with it, flow with it, swim with it, in the end, we will be led to our destiny. To our ultimate destiny, to where God has intended us to be. <br />
<br />
Today, I am free and flowing. :)rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-13049194940185339112009-11-29T19:53:00.000+08:002009-11-29T19:53:47.378+08:00just the truthAs the months pass on, all the more that I long for the truth to reveal itself. I guess it is because I firmly believe in the words, "the truth shall set you free." The moment I became true to how I feel, I haven't stopped yearning to feel totally free. Free to just be me, free to love, free to express this. Paradoxically though, this didn't happen. Instead of being liberated from my own reservations, I felt constricted and limited. I guess because I expected truth as well to the truth I revealed. I'd rather get hurt in the process of knowing the truth than being left in the dark. I am through with assumptions. I've been there, and it's a place I do not want to get myself in again. But the sad fact is, you can't force the truth from someone. Truth is willed. Truth is out of the graciousness of the person to reveal one's self, one's innermost thoughts, one's deepest desires and longings. I guess it takes trust to entrust a person of the truth. I trusted that he can handle the truth. And I hoped that he could trust me that I could handle the truth as well. But it's taking time. I do not even know if it would come to that. Still I hope. Still I hold on to the promise that the truth I let out will eventually set me free.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-8665487794807024122009-10-25T09:38:00.000+08:002009-10-25T09:38:46.011+08:00NakakamissNakakamiss. <br />
Nakakamiss ang panahong andiyan ka pa.<br />
Mga sandaling pareho pa tayong masaya.<br />
<br />
Malaya. <br />
Malayang magpahiwatig ng pagpapahalaga.<br />
Walang pangingiming sabihin anumang nadarama.<br />
<br />
Walang takot.Walang pangamba.Walang malisya.<br />
<br />
Nakakamiss.<br />
Nakakamiss talaga.<br />
Sapagkat ngayon, may nabago na.<br />
<br />
Ang ihip ng hangi'y tuluyang nag-iba.<br />
Ang damdami'y dating malaya, <br />
ngayo'y sukat na.<br />
<br />
Maingat sa bawa't bitaw ng salita.<br />
Pati na rin sa mga kilos na ipapakita.<br />
<br />
Maraming nagbago. <br />
Sa akin. Sa iyo.<br />
<br />
Nakakamiss. Nakakahinayang.<br />
Wala na 'yung dating tayo.rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-25432789949977558392009-09-20T09:42:00.001+08:002009-09-20T09:42:45.738+08:00Patient Trust<meta content="text/html; charset=utf-8" http-equiv="Content-Type"></meta><meta content="Word.Document" name="ProgId"></meta><meta content="Microsoft Word 9" name="Generator"></meta><meta content="Microsoft Word 9" name="Originator"></meta><link href="file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/Renee/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_filelist.xml" rel="File-List"></link><style>
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<div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt;">A prayer by Piere Teilhard de Chardin, SJ. <o:p></o:p></span><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt;"><br />
Above all, trust in the slow work of God.<br />
We are quite naturally impatient in everything to reach the end without delay.<br />
We should like to skip the intermediate stages.<br />
We are impatient of being on the way to something unknown, something new. <br />
And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing through some stages of instability— and that it may take a very long time.<br />
<br />
And so I think it is with you. your ideas mature gradually—<br />
let them grow, let them shape themselves, without undue haste. <br />
Don’t try to force them on, as though you could be today what time<br />
(that is to say, grace and circumstances acting on your own good will)<br />
will make of you tomorrow.<br />
<br />
Only God could say what this new spirit gradually forming within you will be. </span><span style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 11pt;"><br />
Give Our Lord the benefit of believing that his hand is leading you, <br />
and accept the anxiety of feeling yourself in suspense and incomplete.<o:p></o:p></span><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoBodyText">Below then is the account of my progress as it develops in the course of time --- from the time I decided to resign from corporate work to the time I decided to go back.<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/88">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/88</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/89">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/89</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/90">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/90</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/91">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/91</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/94">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/94</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/95">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/95</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/96">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/96</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/60/Joyful._Grateful._Beholden">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/60/Joyful._Grateful._Beholden</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/63">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/63</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/99">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/99</a><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/101">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/101</a><br />
</div><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size: 12pt;"><a href="http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/102/Counting_the_days">http://rebornrose18.multiply.com/journal/item/102/Counting_the_days</a></span><br />
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<div id="refHTML"></div>rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-15711601774451182302009-09-16T18:25:00.000+08:002009-09-16T18:25:07.366+08:00Taxi Tales 2<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>I am always fascinated with the tales of taxi drivers. The subject varies: from politics, economy, weather, religion to more personal stories of love, family, dreams, and struggles. I learned some of the important lessons in life from them. This is my tribute to them. To put a voice to their stories, usually told inside their taxi.</i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i> </i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Modesty and Respect</b><i> <br />
</i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i> </i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I just came from the bookfair when I hailed <i>Manong </i>Taxi. He said he had an interesting discussion with his previous customer, who happened to be a buddhist. So I just remarked that it was interesting and it's good if we also know what their beliefs are about, and that it is good if we can dialogue with them. So he asked me if I were I catholic, so I said yes. Then I asked why, he said he is an <i>iglesia</i>...and that started our interesting talk inside his taxi. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i> <br />
</i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I would say that it helped me that I was fresh from my compre so more or less I am familiar with bible passages, with the teachings of the church, and especially the doctrine about the Trinity. I'd say that <i>manong </i>was quite cautious about presenting his beliefs without offending me. He does not consider himself a fanatic. He also said that he was a catholic before and was brought up (by parents and school) catholic. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">The way <i>manong </i>asked me or at least presented his point to me was subtle. He first asked me about my beliefs on certain things and later on would check if I am consistent with what I have previously said. I was also very careful about the words that I used and the way I explained things to him. He asked me if I believe that there are certain number of people destined to damnation (cf. double predestination of Gotteschalk) as there are certain number of people destined to salvation (cf. early teachings of St. Augustine). He also presented what's wrong about "worshipping" images and idols, as well as asked me what I know about the Trinity. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I tried my best to explain what I know about these things based on what I have learned and also held in belief. I tried not to be technical about my explanations and quote passages in the scriptures to support my beliefs. It was difficult though to get his attention when I started explaining doctrines which he thinks were not explicitly found in the bible, like the term trinity, the term mystery, etc. I said the doctrine of the Trinity is implicitly found in the bible and that it was Jesus who revealed the trinity to us. We should not then just terminate on the term itself but look beyond whom it is pointing to, and that is the God in three persons. The moment I mentioned persons, I need then to explain what persons are as understood by the early fathers. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Anyway, the good thing with <i>manong </i>is that he allowed me to express what I know and my convictions. In the end though, he only left me with the parable of the samaritan woman, when Jesus told the samaritan woman that though they are from the lineage of Jacob, they still do not know who God is. His point was, even if we have faith, it doesn't mean that we know God better than others. That maybe what we know about God is not the truth about God.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">When I alight his cab, we were still in good terms. We both knew that it was a healthy discussion. We both expressed earlier in our conversation that we are not there to argue and convince each other but to dialogue. After our talk, my initial feelings were, did I defend my faith well? Should I have explained our faith clearer to him? Is there truth in what he said that maybe I still do not really know God? </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I answered his initial question about believing if there is damnation by saying that honestly, I am uncomfortable to answer it. It may be because I believe that God is merciful that He would do everything to make sure that I am saved. I may just be optimistic about my salvation. But I told him further that this does not mean that I do not try to do good. I said, maybe right now, my motivation for doing good and avoiding the bad is not out of fear of damnation but out of love. I try to do good out of my love for Christ, because I want to follow him, because I have felt his unconditional love for me. I admitted though that before I was hang up on my sins that I do things out of guilt or because I don't want to be punished.Now I believe that my focus is on Christ and not on the prize or the punishment.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> <br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">So to go back to the three questions I asked myself after getting off his taxi, I guess my optimism tells me that if I were wrong about my beliefs, God, in his faithfulness will bring me to the fullness of truth. I still hold that my trust is in God who neither deceives or can be deceived.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Throughout the duration of our conversation, only one passage kept ringing in my head: "Always be ready to make a defense to anyone who asks for the reasons for the hope that is in you, and make it with modesty and respect." I would say that <i>manong </i>taxi also did the same. So what have I learned from this experience, how has this helped me increase my faith, hope and love? That God's love for me has really transformed me. I am not the old sensitive, defensive person anymore who easily gets upset when my faith is being challenged. I know God's love has changed me already to become more optimistic not only about my own salvation but also of others. Moreso, my conviction that indeed God will lure (thanks Ian for the term) us in the end to choose His way is stronger than ever. <br />
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</span></div>rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-66743428607543275512009-09-13T00:36:00.001+08:002009-09-13T00:43:39.702+08:00A Man's Bestfriend<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I am so excited. Eversince I talked to my ex-officemate about her dog which will give birth this September, I could not stop thinking and wishing that it will be December already. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Originally, I plan to get the dog for my niece MJ for her birthday, but as I get to know the dog, I am slowly considering to just share him/her with MJ. This is the first time I got so excited about the idea of having my own dog. Or taking care of a dog. In the past, we had house dogs, but I seldom take care of them personally. But this time, it is different, I really can't wait. Last night, I couldn't even sleep and I just spent the night imagining how I would take care of him/her. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I guess this is God's answer to my prayer before that He renews my life, that he revitalizes it. Slowly, I feel like my life is being given a new lease. I will start in my new job in October, and hopefully have my own golden retriever by December.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Here is the photo of the mommy of the golden retriever I will get.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxDzhd31bq4cgqADwPmkXOv_39zBuFQJpFiYWgqJnB2Fbig2rOFnLQ5XLQw9YLyfHwbdGdSEmSa2ys4GjCDA26o_9ceRoIXx7BqBbUhHmrXYUrb8GFxy2BGQqfOCf9eG8GxMzAY_FVnIw/s1600-h/small.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxDzhd31bq4cgqADwPmkXOv_39zBuFQJpFiYWgqJnB2Fbig2rOFnLQ5XLQw9YLyfHwbdGdSEmSa2ys4GjCDA26o_9ceRoIXx7BqBbUhHmrXYUrb8GFxy2BGQqfOCf9eG8GxMzAY_FVnIw/s400/small.jpg" /></a></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Here are some interesting information about golden retriever:</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"></span></div><ul style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><li><span style="font-size: small;">They possess a friendly, eager-to-please demeanor,</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">The temperament of the Golden Retriever is a hallmark of the breed and is described in the standard as "kindly, friendly and confident"</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><sup class="reference" id="cite_ref-UK_Breed_Standard_9-3"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Retriever#cite_note-UK_Breed_Standard-9"></a></sup>They are not "one man dogs" and are generally equally amiable with both strangers and those familiar to them.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;"><sup class="reference" id="cite_ref-Golden_Retriever_Extended_Breed_Standard:_Origin_of_The_Golden_Retriever_5-1"><a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Retriever#cite_note-Golden_Retriever_Extended_Breed_Standard:_Origin_of_The_Golden_Retriever-5"></a></sup>The typical Golden Retriever is calm, naturally intelligent and biddable, with an exceptional eagerness to please.</span> </li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Golden Retrievers are also noted for their intelligence. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">These dogs are also renowned for their patience with children.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Golden Retrievers are compatible with children and adults and are good with other dogs, cats and most livestock. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">Golden Retrievers are particularly valued for their high level of sociability towards people, calmness, and willingness to learn. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">They are friendly and tend to learn tricks easily. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: small;">They are also known to become excellent surrogate mothers to different species. Kittens and even tiger cubs from zoos are well taken care of by golden retrievers.</span></li>
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</span></div><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;">Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Golden_Retriever</span></span>rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-70303405163938862112009-09-10T10:27:00.002+08:002009-09-10T10:31:24.173+08:00Taxi Tales<div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>I am always fascinated with the tales of taxi drivers. The subject varies: from politics, economy, weather, religion to more personal stories of love, family, dreams, and struggles. I learned some of the important lessons in life from them. This is my tribute to them. To put a voice to their stories, usually told inside their taxi.</i></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b>Basta (Taxi) driver, sweet lover</b></span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxJuEHR9s3Zpg2mxZoI7DODsYZfOuep9U0CMVy1Pa7gHX7S0ALupahKtAt3sJaBvDGCLE2TcOBGiqImlPSSSDuP672Rmk0UqeaLzVTOmrcNrv0m1eirc25PebTBoCzlwWfobaz404USOc/s1600-h/559236294_b73632d27c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjxJuEHR9s3Zpg2mxZoI7DODsYZfOuep9U0CMVy1Pa7gHX7S0ALupahKtAt3sJaBvDGCLE2TcOBGiqImlPSSSDuP672Rmk0UqeaLzVTOmrcNrv0m1eirc25PebTBoCzlwWfobaz404USOc/s320/559236294_b73632d27c.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">One rainy afternoon, after my class in La Salle, I hailed this Kia taxi cab (I have no choice that time as it was difficult to find an empty cab). </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Pagkasakay ko pa lang, binati na ako ni Manong Taxi ng napakasarap na tawa. Sa loob-loob ko, “patay may topak pa ata etong nasakyan ko.”</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Umupo ako at hindi pa kami masyado nakakalayo, biglang nagsalita si Manong, “Masaya ako ngayon, ma’am kasi anniversary naming ng asawa ko at saka birthday niya!” At bigla na naman siyang tumawa na parang excited at kinikilig. “Talaga po?” tanong ko sa kanya, “…ilang taon na po kayong dalawa?” “30 years na kami ngayon,” sagot niya. “Kaya nga uuwi po ako ng maaga para ilabas siya.” Ang sweet naman nitong si Manong. Doon nagsimula ang kwento ni Manong. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Sa totoo lang, ang dami niyang kwento. Naikwento nya sa akin na may tatlo na silang anak at lahat ay may trabaho na. May asawa na rin iyong dalawang anak niya at may apo na rin siya. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Ipinagmamalaki niya na naitaguyod niya ang lahat ng anak niya sa pagmamaneho. Sabi niya, “Edukasyon lang ang maaari kong ipamana sa mga anak ko. Sabi ko sa kanila, nasa inyo kung babalewalain nyo ang pag-aaral nyo. Kung ayaw ninyong matulad sa akin, mag-aral kayong mabuti para magkaroon kayo ng mas magandang trabaho. Sa awa ng Diyos, nakapagtapos sila lahat at saka may mga trabaho na sila.”</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Natuwa rin ako nung sinabi ni Manong na hanggang ngayon lumalabas pa rin silang mag-anak pag araw ng Linggo. Madalas daw magsisimba muna silang mag-anak tapos magpupunta ng mall para magpahangin, tapos kakain sa labas saka uuwi sa bahay. Hindi ko magawang hindi mainggit kasi ngayon pag araw ng Linggo halos kanya-kanya na kami sa bahay. Siguro dala na rin nang wala na ang daddy ko, may kanya-kanya ng pamilya ang mga kapatid ko at si mommy madalas nagseserve sa simbahan pag Linggo. Hindi ko naitago iyon sa kanya. Sabi nya sa akin sinusubukan nilang gawin iyon tuwing Linggo kasi iyon lang daw ang tanging oras na magkakasama silang lahat. Alam daw ng mga anak niya na importante na tuwing araw ng Linggo eh magkakasama sila.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Muli, napatawa si Manong Taxi. “Ma’am, saan po kaya magandang dalhin si misis mamaya? Naisip ko diyan sa Boulevard. Marami naman sigurong pwedeng kainan diyan ano po? Siguro tama na iyong P500 sa aming dalawa.” Di ko maikubli ang kilig na nadarama, “ang sweet naman talaga ni manong” isip ko. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">“Kayo lang po ba dalawa? Hindi nyo po isasama ang mga anak ninyo?” “Naghanda nga sila sa bahay ngayon eh,” sagot niya. “Hindi nila alam na hindi kami kakain dun. Kami lang ni misis ang nag-usap. Hindi nila alam na hindi sila kasama mamaya.” Natawa siya ulit. “Ngayong gabi, kami lang ni misis, minsan isang taon lang naman kami lumabas na dalawa. Araw naman naming ngayon.” Awwww…sweet. </span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">At parang hindi pa sapat iyon, buong pagmamalaki niyang sinabi sa akin na binilhan niya ang asawa niya ng regalo para sa ika-30 nilang anibersaryo: “Nakabili na rin nga ako ng silver na singsing para sa misis ko. Para naman may maibigay ako sa kanya ngayon. Pinag-ipunan ko nga iyon eh. P345 pesos ang bili ko dun.” Pagkabanggit niya nito, hindi ko na talaga napigilan sabihin sa kanya na ang swerte ng misis niya sa kanya at dasal ko na sana makatagpo rin ako ng lalaking tulad niya. Napangiti lang si Manong.</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
</span></div><div style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Sa tuwa ko kay Manong, dinagdagan ko ang bayad ko. Sabi ko, pandagdag niya sa kain nila ni misis. Hindi ko na inisip kong binobola lang ako ni Manong sa kwento niya. Kung alam lang niya, mas madami akong natutunan sa mga kinuwento niya sa akin. Ang pakiramdam ko para akong ibang tao pagkababa ko ng taxi niya.</span></div><br />
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<input id="gwProxy" type="hidden" /><input id="jsProxy" onclick="jsCall();" type="hidden" /><div id="refHTML"></div>rebornrosehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05115862703447853125noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1065655668048932666.post-32247246214779227712009-09-08T22:43:00.006+08:002009-09-10T10:35:07.071+08:00Today is my last day<meta content="text/html; charset=utf-8" http-equiv="Content-Type"></meta><meta content="Word.Document" name="ProgId"></meta><meta content="Microsoft Word 9" name="Generator"></meta><meta content="Microsoft Word 9" name="Originator"></meta><link href="file:///C:/DOCUME%7E1/Renee/LOCALS%7E1/Temp/msoclip1/01/clip_filelist.xml" rel="File-List"></link><style>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Today is my last day at school. Supposedly, grade consultation day. But I guess my students were all satisfied with their grades kaya walang nagpaconsult sa akin. I’m a bit sentimental right now because I am deferring teaching for now, thus I have to leave my TRED family for the meantime. In the span of three and a half months, I have met some new acquaintances and friends who have welcomed me so warmly. I will miss them. I will miss Ian’s company at lunch and meryenda, and our never-ending kwento about our own vocation, Ivan’s coffee which perks me up after my last class in the afternoon and of course his equally-perky personality, ate Fem’s (our department’s secretary) reliability on all the things I need, Fr. Francis’s humor especially during lunch, Tita Pearl’s motherly “sermons”, Sir Galo’s assistance on Tredfor, and the rest of my co-faculty who have been so very helpful and so accommodating: Doc Louie, Doc Rito, Doc Ed, Charmaine, Ms. Edna, Ms. Carol, Sir Hernan, Christian, Ferds, War, Dan, Lawrence, Dr. Bombongan, and the others who until now I fail to remember the names (pasensya na, blame it on the anesthesia)! Hopefully, our paths will cross again in the future.</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE-cRN0YDwNH1fzTDTtUaBo58EI8eX5syewrsFcEhWy_lLVnZhdmMZD0y9iHY9bcTSdm6kjU4xzaLgQpRQhogDVm0J6aBhtw4-BKmh3TLy-tjrN5Juo753_F0LUvn_eKZdWdYveR-F2qY/s1600-h/P1100820.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE-cRN0YDwNH1fzTDTtUaBo58EI8eX5syewrsFcEhWy_lLVnZhdmMZD0y9iHY9bcTSdm6kjU4xzaLgQpRQhogDVm0J6aBhtw4-BKmh3TLy-tjrN5Juo753_F0LUvn_eKZdWdYveR-F2qY/s400/P1100820.JPG" /></a></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: small;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNSGm0fEe9noFjCp9a3OMaSEAd_0zk583PV_lvBCzofdNE90x0CXSMi4bIrp53IqH2QvP-gvX8FFqyBsrcd4VMdF69TpR9KGSvtXzsN7SBsZfpNA6SuOM1E8-T1J3cxW1eF9FUlldJZCc/s1600/P1100822.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNSGm0fEe9noFjCp9a3OMaSEAd_0zk583PV_lvBCzofdNE90x0CXSMi4bIrp53IqH2QvP-gvX8FFqyBsrcd4VMdF69TpR9KGSvtXzsN7SBsZfpNA6SuOM1E8-T1J3cxW1eF9FUlldJZCc/s400/P1100822.JPG" /></a></span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">My brief stay in La Salle brought so many memorable experiences for me, which I know I will cherish and relish as I go back again to “my” world. I love my students. I am so proud of them. This is the first time I really appreciated what accountability means. That’s why it touches me so much, when one of my students, in his final reflection paper on our course, wrote this:</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjyh4u8kCmrHv9UHnYhYZL_AgDWpybqfnhcMpxqJa7oz3xyAsmC2sL8awHt5L5RN2zw-70Y4Npg9uBMt-f_KheAqV5uHGS79K-cMszvpfZGuYUAcf76bGEJSiFbZfkjOx8oVe-lVznwQ4/s1600-h/DSC00834.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjyh4u8kCmrHv9UHnYhYZL_AgDWpybqfnhcMpxqJa7oz3xyAsmC2sL8awHt5L5RN2zw-70Y4Npg9uBMt-f_KheAqV5uHGS79K-cMszvpfZGuYUAcf76bGEJSiFbZfkjOx8oVe-lVznwQ4/s400/DSC00834.JPG" /></a></div><span style="font-size: small;">This is just one reason I do not regret teaching. I know, in the end, I will resume this noble vocation. Not now though.</span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">As the days passed by and the first day of October approaches, I am becoming more and more ambivalent. I am excited but at the same time sentimental. It’s been two years already since I resigned from my job and left corporate life, and so now, once again, I am going back. I know some of you will be surprised to find this out. I’ve been meaning to explain myself as well why I suddenly I decided to change again my course. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Was it really sudden? I don’t think so. It has been my habit every sembreak to ask myself if it’s time for me to go back to the corporate world. And every time, I would have different reasons. The first sem that I considered it was just a few months I resigned from my job; my reason to going back was financial security. I did not know how I could get by without having a job. Then God provided for my needs: I got a tax refund, I got a few thousands from a production job, and I got a refund for my tuition from a friend. Next bout of this proverbial question was at the end of 2<sup>nd</sup> sem going to summer. I was worried because I still got no work and I wanted to attend a retreat-giving seminar. God’s answer came through a generous friend and my aunt in Italy who both sponsored my seminar fees, and by giving me Bayard. After nine months of having no source of income, Bayard employed me in June on a part-time basis. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> <o:p></o:p></span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Then came another sembreak…I confided with my nun-friend about my plans of wanting to go back to working in corporate, still my reason was to augment my finances and to save for “my future”. Although, I told her that if I would have a choice, I still would like to stay where I am, to work and study and have all the free time I could get! So how did God answer me this time? Nothing. Nothing happened with all my plans. I remained status quo. Then towards the end of last year up to the close of the second sem, I began to actively sought employment again. My reason this time was “selfish”, selfish in a sense that I just want to regain whatever I have lost before: money, prestige, accolade, security, control, etc. And this time, God’s answer was clearly, no! In the end, I gave up my desire to apply for jobs as I have found it difficult to proceed in all my interviews. So I said to myself, maybe, God has other plans for me, maybe he still wants to fulfill his promise to me or rather he still wants to fulfill my desire to teach. Anyway this was my reason for my resigning from my job and taking a course in theology --- to teach about God! And so the rest was history. I got accepted in La Salle. I was given the opportunity to teach. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">And yet, as the term approached its close once again, I began to consider the question that haunted me for the past two years since I left, “is it time for me to go back?” More and more, I realized that my reason now has been purified. It is not just about making lots of money, it is not just about settling my obligation, it is not just about helping out in the family. I believe the reason that made it easier for me to take that step and prove to my prospective employers that I am ready, was my desire to really go back. I realized now that marketing is indeed and has been my passion all along. Yes, teaching has been a long-time dream, and it has helped in my discernment that I experienced it. And yet, what this experience confirmed and re-affirmed was I also have a passion for marketing. I still have that passion burning inside me. And the more I delay addressing this restlessness that is building up, the harder it would be for me to seize it. I realized that my talent is this. I am good at this. I can be more effective doing this. I am sure this is something I can do well. This is something I am passionate about. This is something that will maximize and realize my full potential. And this for me is the key…the world I am going back to is the world where I believe I will experience fullness of life! </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">I am not saying that where I have been in the past two years was a wasteland. I did not regret withdrawing from the world to see for myself what the other world is offering me. I will treasure everything and everyone I met in the past two years. They are now part of my present. I may not be as closely linked to them anymore as before but I am confident of the bond I have established with them. Again, they are now part of my present. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Today is my last day at school. On the 30<sup>th</sup> of September, it would be my last day at Bayard. Symbolically, it would also be my last day living a life withdrawn from the “real” world. </span></div><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">On October 1, I am going back to the world!</span></div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS",sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><span style="font-size: small;"><br />
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